[texting post]

[laughitoff]

Wei Wuxian 魏无羡
22 / M / Hell

THE FEARSOME YILING PATRIARCH! DRIVING EVIL FROM YOUR DOOR WITH A GREATER EVIL! LOVES MILD FOOD, CUTE PUPPIES, LONG WALKS IN THE BURIAL MOUNDS AND KILLING ALL YOUR LOVED ONES!

<span style="font-family:century gothic,helvetica,arial,sans-serif;"><img src="https://i.imgur.com/ScI5Hsw.png" style="height:20px;margin:0 5px -4px 0;"><b style="color:#e75480;">YOUR NAME</b> got horribly cursed by Wei Wuxian!</span> CURSE

<lj-raw><span style="font-family:century gothic,helvetica,arial,sans-serif;"><img src="https://i.imgur.com/P3gZl1b.png" style="height:20px;margin:0 5px -4px 0;"> <b style="color:#e75480;">YOUR NAME</b> declared Wei Wuxian a heretic! <blockquote style="border-left:5px solid #ddd;padding:0 0 0 10px;"> Message_content </blockquote></span></lj-raw> DENOUNCE

<span style="font-family:century gothic,helvetica,arial,sans-serif;"><img src="https://i.imgur.com/w2B4FYG.png" style="height:20px;margin:0 5px -4px 0;"><b style="color:#e75480;">YOUR NAME</b> challenged Wei Wuxian to a duel!</span> FIGHT

CODE BY

Comments

[laughitoff]

Yes, fine.

[STARTS STRIPPIN']

[strikingchords]

[LOOKS BACK AT THE TEMPORARILY RE-CLOSED DOOR]

[laughitoff]

[he's wearing multiple sweaters and his outer robes layered over them when Lan Wangji looks again]

[strikingchords]

[...nods stiffly and leads them out!

time for a snowy, moonlit walk to the condo buildings.]

[laughitoff]

[it's peaceful enough; Wei Wuxian is always in a much better mood about snow when he's warm enough, and the alcohol he did drink has mellowed him out a little]

[strikingchords]

[oh he should have asked if Wei Wuxian wanted the rest of the Emperor's Smile with dinner... no, he would have brought it with him if he wanted it. the thought of him saving it is also kind of nice... :X

Lan Wangji walks along looking like an improbably embodied piece of a landscape painting and fiercely reviewing every recipe he's ever learned from the elder Lan Wangji in his head.]

[laughitoff]

[it's kind of funny, this is the first time they've gone to the claimed condo at the same time willingly...]

[strikingchords]

[the whole thing - including not knowing whatever the hell he did when he got drunk - leaves Lan Wangji pleased and embarrassed and confused and annoyed and adrift, but not in an unpleasant way it's closer to how Wei Wuxian used to make him feel when they were kids, though less intense and heart-wrenching.]

...

I will tell you if I see more Emperor's Smile.

[laughitoff]

[beams at him]

You're a man beyond compare, Lan Zhan!

[strikingchords]

[oh. oh wow????? looks away quickly

hE WASN'T READY TO GO FROM MAXIMUM PINE TO BEING SMILED AT SO FAST]

[laughitoff]

[oh no!!!

they make it to the building without incident]

[strikingchords]

[it's bad. he's got it bad.

opens the door for him when they get there.]

...

Duck or beef?

[he puts the kettle on immediately in case Wei Wuxian wants more cocoa.]

[laughitoff]

Duck!

[strikingchords]

Hm.

[he starts getting ingredients and tools of duck destruction out! Wei Wuxian is free to wander elsewhere in the condo or hang annoyingly over his shoulder making commentary, as the urge takes him.]

[laughitoff]

[he greedily pulls the cocoa tin out and then tries to insinuate himself in helping with cooking]

[strikingchords]

[...Lan Wangji lets him... actually it makes more sense for him to start the rice and stuff, though, since Lan Wangji is adding enough spice to the duck for him already??]

[laughitoff]

[yeah that's fine. it's canon that Wei Wuxian's ok at cooking except for the horrid spice thing, he's got this]

[strikingchords]

[subtly keeps what he's doing a little obscured from Wei Wuxian till Wei Wuxian goes to pour himself cocoa and Lan Wangji can CAREFULLY and WITHOUT FLOURISH follow him in to set the dishes on the table. he made a duck dish and the soup he and the elder Lan Wangji practiced the day before. this feels VERY HIGH STAKES which means he LOOKS MORE THAN EVER LIKE A STATUE.]

...

[laughitoff]

[pauses, struck by a thought, and stares at him over his cocoa mug]

Wait...where did you learn how to cook this? It wasn't in the Cloud Recesses.

[strikingchords]

[looks back at him]

Wangji.

[laughitoff]

Where did--

[an odd expression crosses his face, and then he just shakes his head; he's not sure he wants to know the answer, actually]

[strikingchords]

[he doesn't reply, since Wei Wuxian cut that one off; just inclines his head and starts eating. time to go to pepper hell.

Wei Wuxian's mouth gives him an answer for the question he didn't quite ask, anyway. this is 100% Yunmeng style cooking with chili added to within an inch of its life.]

[laughitoff]

[uncomfortable or not, it is frankly all he can do not to shove the entire dish directly in his face at once]

[strikingchords]

[maybe he happened to be in Yunmeng at some point! thirteen years is a long time and the older Wei Wuxian said the elder Lan Wangji likes to cook. there was plenty of time for him to pick it up incidentally and if he cooks for his Wei Wuxian frequently, it'd be natural for him to start there to teach his counterpart. yeah this all potentially makes sense, right?????

Lan Wangji is QUIETLY AND IMPASSIVELY TRIUMPHANT]

[laughitoff]

Lan Zhan, Lan Zhan, how are you so good at this?